5 Dec

(This is the first installment in a continuing series. All of what you read is true but the identity of the person is being kept anonymous. It is being written because it’s an amazing story of what God can do in a person’s life. Every person has a story)

To her, a name is everything.  While I will not reveal her name, I will tell you that it is hyphenated.  By this, I mean that her maiden name is still carried along with her married name.  Upon first hearing this,  one would assume that she is a feminist or a promoter of some liberal cause.  But it is not just a cliché that you cannot judge a book by its cover. The reality is that today, she is one of the best people you will ever meet.  The truth is that names have meaning to her.  And you will never be able to tell her any different.

She keeps her maiden name for two reasons. First, it is the name her oldest child still carries (more on that later). Secondly, it is the last name of her father who is perhaps the best man she’s ever known.

But there is another name that has meaning to her. It is a name that she has cried out many times in a variety of emotions. She has cried it out in anger, love, confusion and regret.

Her parents were almost children themselves when she was born and before she was even a year old, they were already divorced.   Though she was told many stories of being neglected as a child by her mother, she remembers only a handful of them.  She can recall vividly living in a house with a gas stove. One morning, the doorbell rang and her paternal grandmother had come to visit.  The entire house smelled that day because of a dog that had died.  She told her grandmother that she had eaten crackers and an egg and showed her the trash can where she had found the crackers.  Without a word, her grandmother picked her up and left.

Her father would eventually win sole custody with mother receiving only supervised visitations.  Her father would work three jobs but she recalls being very happy.  The two of them would eventually move out of his parent’s house into one he had built.

Soon, her mother would begin dropping in and out of her life almost like a revolving door.  She was remarried and had two more children.  One night, an argument transpired between her and her mother.  Mom wanted to go out and leave her to babysitting her step-siblings.  She was only 11 and did not want to be alone in the house without an adult.  Her mother got so angry that she slammed her head into a wall. When she came to, her dad was buckling her up in his car. After that, she suffered migraines that would eventually lead to blacking out and seizing. This was usually triggered by stress.  Tests were run and it was decided the migraines triggered the seizures.

After that, she refused to see her alone and rarely did.  By the age of 13, she began to make some poor choices.  A rebellious young teen, she was all about boys and freedom.  She towed the line with her family but when they were not around, she was all about having fun and pushing the line further and further.  One night, while drunk, she was almost raped.

She went out one night when she was supposed to be staying the night with a friend. Her and her friends would drive down Cooper Street and the UTA parking lot when it was the place to hang out.  Her friend bailed on her and so she got a ride with a guy to the house of a friend.  Her friends mother called her dad. He had been going crazy trying to find her. Eventually he went to the police station and was told there was a girl found matching the description of his daughter and he was asked to come identify the body.  When she pulled up with a girlfriends mom who often partied with her and her friends, Dad grounded her for a year and it was 6 months before she was ever let off.   School was a nightmare at that point with racism hitting Mansfield with a vengeance as well as drugs.  There was a fight when a black boy flirted with her and her cousins in a rather aggressive and inappropriate fashion and their friends went in protective mode.  Alone later, she was circled and beaten by the girls.  Her dad showed up and it was messy.

It would not get better for some time.NoPerfectWebsite


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